Men will sometimes tell the fib that they enjoy long walks on the beach. We’ve heard it all before, and quite frankly, it’s a bit corny. Don’t ever lie about your interests because we will find out sooner or later! Yes, we understand that you want us to know you have a sensitive side, but the first date is about getting to know each other, so save the seriously clichéd stroll for a future date.
Show us you listen to what we say by taking seemingly random bits and pieces from conversations we’ve had together and creatively incorporating them into our initial date. For example, in a past conversation in the beginning stages of courting each other, perhaps your date mentioned briefly that she likes baking cupcakes, comes from a small town in wine country, misses her mom’s home-cooked lasagna and that her favorite animal is a tiger. Piece those facts together to plan something simple yet meaningful.
Start by picking her up and surprising her with a dozen...cupcakes! Forget about roses. The cupcakes are sweet (in more ways than one) and are more personal to her than the regular flowers she’s probably already received on previous first dates. Drive to the park and set up a picnic table with food, including homemade lasagna you cooked before the date, to show her that you put in effort to create her favorite dish. If you’re not the best cook in the world or if it doesn’t evoke thoughts of her mom’s cooking, that’s okay. It’s the action that counts! While you’re enjoying the cupcakes from earlier, pour her the wine you handpicked — wine from her hometown! She’ll be impressed that you remembered where she’s from. Let her know you look forward to continuing to get to know her more.
After lunch, don’t tell her where you’re heading next. Keep it a surprise. It’ll keep her on her toes about what you’ve got planned next. Then proceed to drive to your next destination, wherever makes sense for the date you’ve planned – in this example, the zoo! While not typical for a first-date, the zoo gives you the opportunity to have fun in a light-hearted way and opens up the conversation to discuss your surroundings. Believe me, there’ll be plenty to talk about; from the spunky penguins, to the acrobatic gibbon, to the curious elephant. Don’t monkey around — take her to see her animal of choice: the tiger! She’ll appreciate the fact that you made the effort to really cater the date to who she is and the types of things she’s interested in.
Another important piece of being romantic without being cheesy is to not expect anything in return. Don’t make her feel obligated to give anything back. If there’s any inclination that you have ulterior motives, all your romantic gestures will be tainted. If you get a kiss, great! If not, that’s okay – maybe on the second or third date, or however long it takes…
As the date comes to an end, make sure you’ve done everything you’ve planned, but remember, this is a casual date, so act natural. Not everything has to be preplanned. Play things by ear and most importantly, be yourself. If you take the time to get to know your date beforehand, you can plan an original, romantic date. Cliché is passé. Be originally romantic and I guarantee there’ll be a second date!